26: Kapil Pankhania on coaching and being coached

Life Coach Kapil Pankhania takes the Problem Busters through finding a coach, how to make the most out of being coached, and how to coach and mentor those in your team.

Kapil has a refreshingly open and honest way of talking about coaching. He explains the difference between mentoring and coaching, tells his story and answers common questions about how both life coaching and coaching in general can benefit us.

About the show:

Problem Busters is a show that explores solutions to the biggest and the smallest of problems. Hosts Jonathan Goodwin and Oliver Happy discuss making the world a better place with guests from far and wide.

About our guest:

Kapil Pankhania is a life coach from North London, currently working with Ollie at Form3. Kapil has a background in Finance and technology.

Show mentions:

  • Realising that coaching was a good route to becoming a better person, both professionally and personally
  • App: Spotify
  • Arriving at coaching as an idea
  • Looking for a workshop and running into Becky, who was running the workshop.
  • Life Coach: Becky Balzano became my first coach
  • The benefits of coaching
  • Coaching as a way to become more self-aware
  • 05:00 Overcoming the excuse of “I have no time”, and the importance of finding time for myself
  • The value of putting time aside for myself every morning, for journaling, reading and plugging away
  • Becoming aware of where you are spending your time
  • Identifying where time is not being spent well, and substituting it for something more valuable
  • 07:00 The emotional aspect of coaching. Digitised world, rare to have a time to have a proper conversation, about you.
  • The value of saying things out loud – taking a big breath of fresh air.
  • 09:00 Listening but also being present in the conversation. Really understanding where they are at before suggesting solutions.
  • Coaches are not perfect, we are all humans.
  • Trying not to relate to the client, but remaining separate in order to focus entirely on them and their challenge.
  • 12:30 Advice to people who are looking for a coach
  • Look for a coach you can trust, who is a good listener and is non-judgemental
  • Suggest a first discovery session to see if you will work well together.
  • 15:00 Figuring out what coaching is to you – and what each person wants to get out of the process.
  • The importance of momentum and impact
  • 18:30 What to expect from your first discovery session with a coach
  • 20:00 How to get the most out of working with a coach
  • Insight: The goal presented initially is not always the ultimate goal
  • The importance of picking a place to start – the first challenge to tackle
  • Write down as much as possible before the session
  • Take notes as you go, so you have something to refer back to
  • 24:00 The value of being accountable for your actions – of committing to take action. Playing back in next session on which actions you’ve taken.
  • The value of taking action between sessions
  • 26:30 What I’ve learned from coaching people
  • 28:30 The importance of just letting people speak.
  • The importance of reading body language
  • 31:00 The difference between mentoring and coaching.
  • The value of asking good questions
  • 33:30 Advice for Managers wanting to coach their teams better
  • Demonstrating the power of coaching is the way to sell it.
  • 34:30 The value of developing a coaching culture, both between managers, at the exec level and out to all people in the business.
  • 36:00 common mistakes managers make when coaching others
  • The importance of not making assumptions. Ask, don’t assume.
  • Ask questions first in order to understand
  • 37:00 How to develop a feeling of trust, of being heard
  • 38:00 Daily habits I have picked up from coaching
  • The value of a solid early morning routine
  • Journaling as a daily practice. Thoughts on the day, what I’ve learned, unlocking your thoughts and creating space for new thoughts.
  • The importance of reading regularly – as a way to learn
  • Book: The miracle morning
  • 41:00 The value of goal setting
  • Getting crystal clear on what you want to get done, so you can start your day with purpose
  • 42:00 the difference between life before and after goal setting
  • 43:30 What it was like to start journaling
  • Realising the importance of writing down my thoughts rather than what was happening around me.
  • 45:00 The sharing section
  • Who do I most look up to in the world? NBA Kobe Bryant (LA Lakers). He won many championships, but he had both an amazing work ethic and was a great person. The Black Mamba.
  • Book: Can’t hurt me by David Goggins
  • A remarkable guy with remarkable mental toughness
  • Movie: Good Will Hunting
  • One thing you’d like to change in the world? Have people being more empathetic and have more compassion for the people around them. To not judge people for who they are and what they’ve done, but understanding them first.
  • The best way to see how other people see the world is to ask them questions.
  • 50:00 One thing would you like people to take away from this episode – look at your own motivations. Are you living your life on auto pilot? Or are you living your values?
  • Look at the 2-3 main things you did in a day and decide if they served you or should be eliminated.
  • Coach: Paul Søgaard
  • Putting YouTube videos out as a way to help share knowledge with people.
  • YouTube channel: Coaching Conversations
  • getting in touch
  • website: www.kapil.coach

Logo and concept by Christy O’Connor

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